Jamie Thomson has been a writer of books and computer games for many years. He is now the minion and slave of the Dark Lord, Dirk Lloyd. He lives in the dungeons below his Master’s Iron Tower, chained to a desk, where he spends every day writing for his overlord. Or else.

The Dark Lord books are out now in all good book shops, dungeons, dark towers and evil emporiums. The first in the series, Dark Lord the Teenage Years won the Roald Dahl Funny Prize, 2012 which is of course, awesome!

Jamie has a new series out in October 2014, the first of which is called ‘The Wrong Side of the Galaxy’. It’s about Harry, a thirteen year old boy who walks out of his house one day only to be abducted by aliens. He wakes up on a strange spaceship to find all the aliens are dead and he’s left in charge with a broken super-computer and some freaky alien stowaways. He’s got to get back home to Croydon in time for tea – except he’s stuck on the Wrong Side of the Galaxy, and he doesn’t even know where the planet earth is, let alone home! Let the adventures begin.

 Jamie does a lot of school and festival visits with his Dark Lord Travelling Roadshow! If you want to arrange a visit to your school or festival, you can contact his publisher, Orchard Books or message Jamie via his website.

Jamie has also written a lot of choose your own adventure style game-books. To find out more about those on his Fabled Lands site.

Dark Lord: The Teenage Years

Thirteen-year-old schoolboy, Dirk Lloyd, has a dark secret – in fact he is a dark secret. Dirk – according to his own account – is the earthly incarnation of a Dark Lord, supreme ruler of the Darklands and leader of great armies of orcs and warriors, intent on destruction and bloody devastation. Following a colossal final battle between the forces of good and evil, the Dark Lord was defeated and hurled by his arch-foe’s spells into the Pit of Uttermost Despair. At the bottom of the Pit lies…a supermarket car park in the municipal town of Whiteshields, somewhere in modern day England. And when he is found, and tries to explain that he is the Dark Lord, people think he means Dirk Lloyd. The fact that he’s trapped in the puny body of a schoolboy doesn’t help.

And so begins Dirk’s battle to recover his dignity, his power, and his lands… Along the way he faces the inconvenience of being fostered by a do-gooding family, the Purejoies; the torture of endless hours of drudgery at the Whiteshields Brainwashing Centre (aka school); a vengeful Headmaster; two interfering Psychotic Persecutors (psychotherapists); and constant laughter and disrespect when he attempts to marshall his lackeys and lickspittles (friends) to do what he wants them to.

Dirk makes friends with the son of his foster family, Christopher, and the local Goth Girl, Sooz, and together they attempt to cast a spell that will transport Dirk back to his homeland. Inevitably, not everything goes to plan… But that’s for book 2.


Dark Lord: A Fiend in Need

Sooz, a 13 yr old girl from Surrey has become the Dark Mistress of Dirk’s otherworldly kingdom, the Darklands. Thanks to the Ring of Power given to her by Dirk, his minions recognize her as their ruler. Sooz immediately sets about redecorating Dirk’s Dark Tower to the taste of a young girl.

But Sooz has to face her toughest challenge when an army of fanatical paladins and orcs gather to march against her. Despite their centuries of hostility to each other, they prefer to form an alliance rather than accept Sooz’s new regime.

And what of Dirk? He continues on slaving away at school, plotting ways to rescue Sooz. Eventually he is able to advise her on life in the Darklands and Sooz is able to hold back the fanatical paladins.


Dark Lord: Eternal Detention

Fear me, o miserable worm!

I, the Great Dirk, take up my pen once more to record the utter misery that is SCHOOL. My sworn enemy, Hasdruban the White, has infiltrated Whiteshields School and seeks vengeance on me. Naturally, I will triumph. But it is the Dirkest Hour indeed.


The Wrong Side the of the Galaxy

Abducted by aliens, Harry wakes up on his birthday marooned on a spaceship. His only companions: two freaky princess clones, a weird alien-fish-kangaroo hybrid with delusions of grandeur and a ship’s computer with a serious attitude problem. It’s the worst birthday ever.

How is he ever going to get back to Earth now?

 

The course was very useful, even for a Dark Lord.

- Jamie Thomson